Aquitaine 14th of February 1768.


Dear diary,

its been a long time since i have written something. Maybe its better i start to write down again my thoughts, to clear my troubled mind....

I arrived in Aquitaine again, the quiet town i left a few months ago. It's good to be back. I can think and work here. So many books i still have to read. I love taking long walks at the countryside... The winter is fleeing and spring lurks around the corner... Flowers are preparing to blossom again. I am in love with the smell of roses and lilies... Can't wait till the summer...

Yesterday i attended the Timeless Romance Ball. I was surprised by all the splendor and people there. The Duke and Duchesses are very charming and warm hosts. The Grand Palais was decorated with plants and flowers everywhere. It must have costed a great deal of work to arrange all that... So many great looking outfits also.
I am never sure about myself, how to behave in such a crowd. I guess i am a loner after all. Some ladies wanted to dance with me, but i am afraid i made a complete fool out of myself... Awww the matters of the heart... I am ignorant regarding those i am afraid. I'd rather fix a dozen broken limbs than to unraffle the mysteries of a woman's needs....

Lucky my lovely assistante showed up. I first met her when i was still studying in Leiden. One day i had attended a lecture of the great Dr. Boerhaave, when i got out of the building and stumbled upon her... After we both got up, and i picked up all her scattered groceries.... we started to talk. She had lived a hard life, but was very intelligent and keen to learn. Since then we are a team. She helps me with some daily matters when i am at home and assists me with difficult operations. Sometimes, when i am on my travels, we don't see each other for months. But then again, when we meet, its... like coming home...
Dear diary, i am afraid i have been secretly in love with her all that time... If she ever finds out, i am afraid for what could happen...

I got the books i ordered today. Oh My God, i got the "Exercitatio anatomica de motu cordis et sanguinis in animalibus" ('The Anatomical Function of the Movement of the Heart and the Blood in Animals') from William Harvey. At last !!! I am so excited i found a nice copy. It costed me a fortune, but it is worth every penny...

Owwww my, i still keep having those terrible nightmares... Won't they ever go away? I better take some Laudanum tincture again tonight. Maybe i get some peace then....


P.